fast kimberly

this fast femme fatale is kymberly herrin. she was Miss March ahhh, i don't remember they year. but woah, is sure remember miss kymberly. one of my favorite things about this centerfold? i love, love, love those aviator-style sunglasses! but hey, there's a LOT to love about this spread. first of all, her boobs do not appear to be plastic. she's got some kinky reason for holding onto some binoculars. i love those thigh-high boots, her 'all-over' non-orange tan, and she drives a super-snazzy red car. ( is that a corvette? ) thanks, miss herrin. thanks so much for posing in that fur... and not much else. we really appreciate it.

the face

the film was 'isadora duncan, the biggest dancer in the world.' the director was ken russell. i was about eight years old when this film was fatefully shown on PBS, late one weekend night. at the time i had no idea who ken russell was. my mothers was going from channel to channel. i just watched as things like 'M*A*S*H', the evening news, maybe 'Kojak,' whatever was showing around ten o' clock in 1980. suddenly, the dial stopped at PBS... and i watched the black and white images of a woman, in flapperish dress, flit into a vintage car as 'bye bye blackbird' warbled in the background. it was blithe and breezy... and then everything changed. the woman's long scarf was snagged by the speeding wheels, her head jerked back violently... she was killed... her neck broken. and ken russell made sure we didn't miss a thing. he pulled in for a pair of grizzly close-ups. this is one of them. i had never seen anything like it in my life. i was terrified. terrified. i froze... i felt i physically could not even close my eyes. my body started vibrating... and at the same time, went numb. i was not a large enough creature yet to contain the immense horror i felt. i will never forget it. my mother was there, almost trying to snap me out of it... as if she sensed her baby was affected in a way she never had been before. that was true. for the longest time i had no idea who was responsible for utterly destroying my peace of mind. that was the night i fell in love with Ken Russell. ( the actress is vivian pickles )

experimental hits

a few months ago, i was bored so i started playing around with the features on this laptop that was soooo generously donated to The Cause. i call this technique 'glass cutting.' i sort of randomly choose some shots, arrange them, then used a cropping tool to slice out an area that looked cool to me. the colors, values, subject matter... all sorts of things are in play... but i'm not actively thinking about them at the time. yeah, at the time i'm just effing around. but i like the end result. kind of like little psychedelic sticks of gum. as you can see, we've got a hitchcock poster, marilyn monroe, and a cover of 'smash hits' starring billy idol.

two taylors

anyone who knows me well at all knows i'm a lifelong, die-hard fan of duran duran. and even after all these years, sometimes i see pictures i've never seen before. it probably goes without saying that The Internet Age has dumped probably hundreds of rare shots into my lap since i got my first machine. this shot is a prime example. it shows the lovely square-chinned john taylor in the background, looking all sensuous... lurking behind those dark magenta bangs. and in the foreground is roger... who always rocked the same kind of bangs, regardless of what era was going on. yes, two taylors... the ones that provided the thumping backbone to that 'gotta dance' duran duran sound. and they both still look great. but without the internet, i wonder if i ever would've seen a shot like this.

police

this is one of my favorite recent book covers. the main image is john malkovich from the groovy dark comedy 'the shadow of the vampire.' i had that picture in my picksh collection for literally years before i was finally moved to put it on a cover. after all these years i am still in love with john malkovich. and bubbling beneath him we can see images of ronan vibert, georgina hale, oliver reed from 'tommy,' and nigel planer from 'the young ones.' i think i chose the word 'police' because well, i already had it printed out, and because i had recently finally read '1984.' you know... the 'thought police,' and all that. i am very proud of this one. too bad the book is all full of hot trash... but what can you do?

gloss

this is one of my hand written, hand decorated journals. the main image is liza from 'cabaret.' the circle inset is art garfunkel from nicolas roeg's 'bad timing.' other stars visible are georgina hale from 'mahler,' and pete townshend. it's not one of my favorites, but i thought i'd post it anyway.

sluts!

okay, i guess 'sluts' is probably a pretty strong word. these two ladies may be very well mannered and respectable these days. but this shot was obviously taken in their 'slut' phase. but this shot is not so much about their manner, but their attire. dig all that underwire and lace! taken altogether, the stuff looks kinda mismatched and cheap, but if you look at each item individually, there's some real sweet underwear on display here. like that lilac bra on the brunette. top class bra artistry, there. and that turquoise garter belt on that blonde chick? it goes so well with her like-colored panties and stockings. another thing i find remarkable about this photo: a complete and total lack of airbrushing or photoshopping of any kind. maybe a little bit of gauze, but that's IT. i dig the way that the bras don't match the drawz on either girl. i like the way one is tan and one is pale. knowing today they'd both be orange-y 'tan.' hey, thanks for posing, babes. we mean it.

morrissey and his boys

at first glance, one might think this is like, photoshopped or faked in some way, but i am here to assure you; it is very real. this is a shot of morrissey ( center ) about a year ago, with his band. annnd it probably goes without saying that they are very highly nude, save for the strategically placed 45's. ( and i'm still trying to figure out exactly how they're attached. ) personally, i think morrissey's bod looks pretty damn good. then again' he hasn't had meat in like, 50 years. and in case anyone is interested, the last 15 years of his work has been some of the best. and he's clearly not shy about strippin' for the camera lenz. i used to know all these blokes names, but i can only remember three of them now. from left to right we've got jesse... wow, i just blanked on jesse's last name. tobias! jesse tobias. then we've got mr. paleskin, who's name i used to know. then morrissey, of course, then boz borer, then matt walker. i've gotta hand it to these guys for 'lettin' it all hang out.'

yes, miss garbo

ahhh, 'the garbo i knew.' i've been a fan of greta garbo since like, mmm... 1987? sometime around then. i was blessed in the fact that my high school had a relatively good library. ...and as soon as i discovered it, i started stealing from it. one of the books i hauled was a hardcover catalog of early cinema. that's where my movie knowledge really got a foothold. ahhh, the sweet days before security strips and video surveillance! man, that library was probably like, 1,000 pounds lighter by the time i graduated. but it was worth it for the education. i love this ethereal shot of greta louisa gustafsson. her smallish boobs, the way she holds her body, that hand on her hip, that sexy yet intelligent look in her eye... what a goddess. even the way her hand is placed is elegant and provocative. greta lived an intensely private life... and when i was much younger, i was perplexed by that. but now, with all i've been through in my travels, i totally know where she's coming from. these days, i'm like, 'the fewer eyes on me, the better.' i remember in drama class one time, i had to write a skit... and in it, was the name 'greta garbo.' but when it came time for the kid to read the line, it came out as 'great garbo.' i mean, she was great, but... you know what i mean.

sylvie moderne

i'm huge fan of sylvie vartan... and magazine covers are one of my main passions. so you can only imagine how much i dig magazine covers featuring sylvie vartan. so cool, this issue of 'mademoiselle age tendre.' sylvie is rocking something that vaguely resembles the outfit simon le bon wore in the video for 'the reflex.' technically speaking, sylvie is not French, she was born in Bulgaria. she grew up in France, and became one of the first women in rock from that area of the world. she was eventually personally acquainted with the Beatles and performed as their opening act in many European dates. it is not difficult to find photos of her with the lads in the early to mid '60's. many say that is HER little blue skirt and legs on the back cover of 'abbey road.' i love sylvie vartan.

janus

i've never heard of Janus magazine, but from the looks of the little illustration, i'm guessing it's racy. the drawing is even a bit dodgy... it's like she's surprised her ass is showing, even though she's wearing a skirt that could never possibly cover her panties. okay, this issue promises an article on 'spanking attitudes.' what? like, '...hey, that guy who spanked me last night had a real positive attitude.' and it seems we can also read all about 'female exhibitionists.' hey, i'm all for that. there's also something about 'secret lives... unusual tastes.' wake me when it's done. and finally, it tells us to expect 'over 50 exotic pictures.' well, hell... that could be photographs of ibis-birds and crocodiles or like... salamanders.

so early duran

this is a very early picture of simon le bon, john taylor, and andy taylor of duran duran. i don't know who ever told andy that blonde haystack look was a good look. it wasn't. and john was blind as a bat. he was either wearing funky contacts, or he just couldn't see. i always liked that dark haircut on simon. nick's not in the picture, but he was also rockin' a bleach job that didn't do him any justice. jean-luc took this screen shot... right on the edge of the 80's. and to this very day, they're still turning out world-class pop.

jean-lucien 4 art's sake

this one is so seamlessly lovely it almost melts into itself. jean-lucien, through his laser cutting skills and taste for color and tone, creates a lush organic masterpiece that both tricks the eye and teases the mind. it is spectacular. sigh... i don't know how he does it. i'm just glad he does.

jean-lucien's pink fix

when you need a fix of some serious art, look no further than the mind of jean-lucien godet. apart from being balanced and symmetrical and sound, it is also fantastically gorgeous. could his stuff be any more fun to look at? i doubt it. i am so proud of my partner. he works tirelessly, yet consistently turns out a quality product. i love this one. i love the languid man smoking in the foreground. ( jeremy irons is the model, by the way. ) all the textures and tiny moments within just work so well. i'm not joking when i say i can almost taste it. it doesn't get better than a godet.

jean-lucien's latest magic

any entries accompanying jean-lucien godet's work will be succinct. i think the genius speaks for itself. man, the harmony of colors, the balance of the composition... it is perfect stuff. he sent this one to me a few days ago. ( hey wait, my cat's mewling... gotta throw her some treats. ) okay, where was i? oh yeah... the mad genius. seriously, i could fall into his work like a heavy dose of dreams. there is nothing else like it.

happy late birthday martin scorsese

i just realized marty's birthday was like, three days ago or something like that. i guess i don't need to tell any of you that i'm a fan of his work. and i think he was quite a fox in his day. i found this great shot of marty on the set of 'taxi driver' a little while ago. i love it. i know it's sinful of me to dig that he's posing with a big-ass evil gun, but i must admit, i have a purely scientific interest in firearms. i can't tell you what make of gun it is, but that is one long barrel. i dig how you can tell from the photograph what a petite man he is. he's almost being swallowed by that chair. and man, do you think his macho-man 1970's shirt could be any tighter? those buttons are straining to contain his genius. and what's with the grapes? well, he is italian. ( way to eee-stereotype it. ) thanks, marty... seriously. thanks for 'taxi driver,' and 'king of comedy,' and 'mean streets' and 'goodfellas.' and a few others.

lui oh my!

this sunny chick is great. she has the nerve to look surprised... like, ' o my god where's my top...?' hey, you know where your top went, sweetie. dig those funky earrings. she's pretty, though. it seems this is the 'special saint-tropez.' hey, remember that croonin' commercial? "bain de soliel for the st. tropezzz tannn..." her bottoms are a little baggy on her. what is she, like, a size 'less-than-zero?' ( mmm, sour grapes with me and my size 12 drawz. )

lui sweet jane

jane birkin, ladies and gentlemen. you may think you don't know her, but you probably do. she played the frail maid in the agatha christie film version of 'death on the nile,' and christine redfern, the frail wife in the film version of 'evil under the sun.' ( one of my favorite movies, ever. ) and here she is, daring to be baring it with a tit-load of beaded necklaces. she was also the waifish protogee of french svengali serge gainsbourg in the 70's. she even cut a few pop records. ( check youtube. ) from the phrase 'special noel,' i'm assuming this is the boffo christmas issue. i dig those hip-snugging black panties.... or, les panteez noir. yeah, i'm a big fan of janie birkin. she can come to my holiday party anytime.

lui on hot wheels

this is one of my favorite 'lui' covers i've ever seen. i love the head-on nature of the shot, and the fact that it's centered gives it an almost-Rorschach-esque quality. or maybe like a pinned exotic insect specimen. but it's none of those things! it's a sexy french kitten on a motorcycle! and she wants you to 'head out on the highway' with her. seriously, i wish i had this one in like, poster-size. fortunately, this one has writing i can easily read. evidently, in this issue we can look forward to 'jane fonda,' hey, i'll bet she takes her clothes off, ( she does, i've seen the spread, it's pretty awesome... i'll try to find that one for you... ) and ummm, whoa, hold up! le 'ku klux klan..???' i sure as hell hope that's a scathing sociological study-and-or-exposee. annnd, someone named j.p. melville, and last but never, never least, my darling mark twain. the chick could be better looking in the face, but... hey, like i should talk... i'm not naked on any magazine covers straddling any bikes.

lui bardot

ummm, i probably won't have too much to say about this one. particularly since there's not much print on the cover, and i'm not the biggest Bardot fan in the world. but, to be fair, i've seen almost none of her work. morrissey is personal friends with her, though... on account of her 'animals are people; meat is murder; i don't eat my friends' thing they have in common. and hey, have you seen morrissey lately without a shirt on? well, don't get me wrong, i prefer him heavier... but all i'm saying is some of that vegetarian stuff he eats must not be all that light on the calories. i still think he has all his own hair, though. and i don't think he's had any 'work done' facially... unlike some pop stars i know. ( i'm calling you out, simon 'le face lift' le bon. ) okay, wait... weren't we talking about miss Bardot? i guess we kinda were. it's funny, looking at a picture of her like this one, it becomes almost laughingly obvious how those early 90's Guess? jeans ads were with claudia schiffer; cash-in/rip-off/ homage-wise.

lui les stripes

okay, bear with me, the computer just ate this whole text entry, so i'm gonna have to try to do it all over again from memory. so, what did i say about this one again? oh yeah, when i first glanced at this one, i thought she had on an actual shirt, then i saw the nips and... ( shrug. ) and speaking of 'painted on,' how tight are those teeny skin-tight orange shorts? and um, what's with the rope? is that part of some vaguely nautical theme i'm supposed to 'get?' like, has she been pressganged into some kind of 'sex-navy?' and what could be the explanation for that injured and embarrassed look on her face? maybe her drill sergeant turned out to be the father of some kids she used to babysit for. the dad who used to make inappropriate comments and put his hand on her leg on the drive home and ask her if she was wearing an underwire bra yet ... it's like she's thinking, CHICK: "...um, i know it was a few years ago, Mr. Cliverson, but you still give me the predatory-creeps. yes, i know... this is the Sex Navy... i'd better get used to it." (-sniff- )