sporty spice

hey, twins, man, twins...!! here we have twin sisters yvette and yvonne sylvander, on the cover of 'sports illustrated' back in january 1980-something. now, ladies and gentlemen... THOSE are bathing suits! i almost can't decide which one i like better. personally, i prefer to wear one-pieces, on account of my high waist and all. but these chicks don't appear to have any figure flaws to be concerened with. and fortunately for us, this picture is old enough that chances are, the girls are real... (maybe there's been a little airbrushing, but not much more.) i mean, they obviously don't have those fake-ass bubble boobs... i hate those. like, what's wrong with soft, sudsy boobs? like, when did they go out of style? plus, you know i love it when cheesecake girls look like they're genuinely happy and having a good time. and hey, they're twins! like, who could ask for anything more? just a great summertime picture. dig it.

louise and lisa burns, ladies and gentlemen

halloween was friday night, as you know. and i have no doubt hundreds of thousands of freaky folks stayed in and watched movies. and one such movie was 'the shining.' and one of the scariest things about that film is, are... the party-dressed ghostly twin girls, who roam hand in hand, interacting with danny from beyond the grave. being a twin myself, i know where those little ladies are coming from. and they deserve some serious credit. they are, indeed, powerful, indelible, horrifying, delightful, 20th century film icons. their names are louise and lisa burns. thanks girls, for all the terrible, long sleepless nights. and good luck to the both of you. (click to enlarge.)

twins : a universal language

i've always said that identical twins are a universal language. you get three people from three different continents, show them twins, and they all immediately know what they're seeing. i wonder what its like not to be one? i mean, being a twin is the coolest thing in the world. i can't imagine what its like to not be 90% telepathic. the coolness is just off the chart. and hey, twins are sexy, too. i dare you to find someone who wouldn't say yes to bedding down a cute set of twins. these real twins were on the cover of this playboy... and i think they had a real spread in the magazine... but something tells me that's not their real hair. i'm calling 'wig' on these two. perhaps they wanted a little disguise so their old grandmother's friends wouldn't go batshit. who knows? but here's three cheers for twins. sexy, sexy twins.

the assistants

this is a still from ken russell's musical masterpiece, 'tommy.' the man is, of course, roger daltry, and man... i really should know the chick's names; seeing as how they're twins. hey, thanks to this Wild Machine, i just learned they are uncredited identical twins Susan and Jennifer Baker. i was somewhere around... mmm, it must've been seven or maybe eight years old, maybe younger, the first time i saw this film on HBO. the 'acid queen' sequence was the only part that i remember creeping me out, but even then, i was thrilled to see twins. twins are great. no matter what language someone speaks, they know twins when they see them. as i've often said, twins are a universal language.