cig pants!

hey, if you smoke those vile and deadly cigarettes (which i do, guilty) then you've GOTTA get yourself a pair of of these ultra-dated, groovy looking Cig Pants!.. from the good people at Winston. what better way to let the world know that you 'don't give a damn about' your health OR fashion?! and you've just gotta accent those Cig Pants with some mod shades and a clingy, white, longsleeved top. so, round up your $2.95, clip that coupon, and send away for those pants! nobody will know how diseased your lungs look on the inside, when you look THIS groovy on the outside! i don't smoke Winston's myself. (mmm, as if that matters at all.) hey, it just occurred to me... when Winston ran this promotion all those years ago, they MUST'VE had like, a shitload of these pants already made, and like, ready for the hundreds of redeeming Winston customers. and they must've had them in a variety of sizes and everything. and it would seem almost certain that at least some of those pants still exist today. i wonder who's got them? like, they can't ALL be in a landfill by now, can they? (cut to a shot of a yard sale going up this Sunday. we see a rack old clothes on some lawn cluttered with junk. as the camera pulls in, we see a pair of the Cig Pants hanging next to a faded 'Mork' T-shirt with rainbow sleeves that says, 'Nannoo-Nanoo' : Translation - Is It Friday Yet?' ) (click to enlarge... a lot of the copy should be readable.)