diane von unclear

hey, there's nothing like the 80's for misguided hair and makeup attempts. i snagged this ad tonight whilst rebuilding my files. and woah, do you think she's got enough makeup on? or is the ad for perfume? or both? anyway, the chick needs to take it down a notch. man, the sad thing is, there was probably a time in the 80's when i would've daydreamed, extensively, about walking into my school having transformed into exactly what you see here. and in the dream, everyone, even the bitchy girls would be so struck by my 'with it' beauty that they'd drop all the hazing and hatred and stand back, wishing they could be like me. then i'd telekenetically make them slip in the mud or something in front of some guys they were desperately trying to look cool in front of. and keep in mind when you look at this shot, that i've retouched this photo, and have really dialed down the garishness and 'hot pink' scorch. and it doesn't even look like they've got in on straight. (the lipstick) i mean, its not even within the lines of her lips. and those eyebrows! hey, i remember the 80s, and i understand styles change, but i can't like, humanly fathom trying to 'bushy up' and 'wolf-out' my brows to be like, more heavy and out of control than they appear on their own. and she looks cross-eyed and drugged, like two people in two different corners of the studio called out, 'hey, baby, baby...over here!' at the exact same time.

unclear on bolan

okay, so like i mentioned in the post below, i'm determined to post at least one thing each night, but since my resources are scarce, be kind. this shot got a yuk out of me. its the legendary and usually quite successfully glam marc bolan of t-rex fame. it looks like he's doing some kind of radio interview. and his hair and face look pretty flawless but... what the heck it up with that blouse? its got some kind of raggedy-ann 70's-for-girls trim across the chest. does he have a holly hobbie patch on his bell-bottomed jeans too? did he like, wake up in a strange house after a night of much nose candy and just grab the first thing he saw, namely, some innocent 10 year old girl's nightgown? i've seen him look more butch in a feather boa. well hey, rock and roll!

cheering up

so, as most of my mates know by now, i'm rebuilding my image library from the ground-up, but i'm determined to post at least one thing every night. so um, hey! for the hell of it, dig this breezy, free-and-easy shot of miss julie andrews, posing it up with some froofy purple feathered thing. i love julie, seriously, but something about this shot cracks me up. maybe she's singing her lesser-known 1970 hit pop single, "trixie-pop girl." you know, it was the one that went, "i want to be your trixie-pop girl... pull out the rumble seat, lets go for a whirl... all the other sue's and sally's had better step aside, your trixie-pop girl wants to go for a ride.." yeah, you know, it was pretty big. and then it had the chorus, "...knocking knees," (wooden knock-knock sound effect) "...swinging from the trees," (corny 'wheeee!'-whistle sound effect) "...the she's and he's... are all aiming to please...!" etc, etc. i think it was featured in one of her early bbc tv specials. i think the name of it was 'oh, to be julie!' and i think you can snag it on e-bay. i think some of the other tracks are 'do the tortellini,' 'oh, james,' and the 7 minute-long slowie, 'the clover's all over.'

depressed? a little bit, yeah

so, real fast to all loved ones. last night my computer snagged a very whorish destructive virus which demolished every last one of my picture and video files, as well as did a lot of other things. i've spent the whole day wrestling with an effing machine. after about ten hours, i finally got it back on line, only to get interrupted by an impossible-to-get-past offer to buy virus protection!! so i finally got it back up again, but expect to be cut off any moment now. so, here's the only picture i have right now. its morrissey, and his pissed-off face speaks of my pain. i hope to remedy things and come back in full force soon, but until i do,

just keep in mind i'm going to have very limited access to my mail, this blog, etc. and hey, lucynell... i think

your phone number went down with the ship, so over the next few days, either leave it with jean-lucien, or

call me between 10 am and 10 pm to remind me. arrrghhh! high tech bites me in the ass! if i can manage to before it crashes again, i'll post some more. i love you all!

p is for the police : king of pain - video

according to the given information, this is the police, at their precipice, performing the hell out of their hits in atlanta, ga. this has been, and will always be one of my favorite police tracks. and this version is loud and great and quite loyal to the original recording.

p is for pins

wow, pins man... pins. where have all my pins gone? obviously, these are duran duran pins. and i'm not trying to brag, but i don't think there's one pictured that i didn't have. i used to dream about owning my own pin-slash-badge maker. i remember the way they (the pins) felt in my hand, and i recall i wore them most often on my left-hand side of my chest. hey, as an exercise in like, 'life affirming,' maybe i should track-down-and-buy some duran duran and-or morrissey pins. like, just for the hell of it. but i gotta give the 'inventor' of the modern 'badge pin' some credit. i mean, i can honestly testify that i accidentally had my fair share of those slick little suckers 'go through the wash,' and 97% of the time, they came out alright. so they had to be reasonably well-made. i must admit, i still like to see a guy-or-chick with some pins on. to me, its a sign that they're not taking themselves too seriously. and i like that. and i also believe in 'representing' your heroes. (click to enlarge)

p is for patricia quinn

okay, i'm getting kind of tired. but hey, dig this shot of patricia quinn. you perhaps know her better as 'magenta,' the wild maid from 'the rocky horror picture show.' now, i've always believed patricia was a very pretty lady, but when i ran across this shot, i couldn't decide if i thought it was genuinely 'cool and flattering,' or 'just plain hilarious.' i mean, look at that slap-dash handmade-looking sweatshirt she's got on. like, i can see some lips and teeth, so i'm thinking it might be some sort of homage to her legendary creation of 'magenta' on the stage and screen. but, if they were trying to make 'the lips' look like the 'lips' on the poster, then they've got a lot more art class to go to. man, i can't even draw, and i'll bet i could draw some 'lips' that looked more like 'the lips.' i wonder if she's wearing-and-posing-in-it just to be nice, like, to whoever made it for her. but i like this picture because it reminds me of the fact that there once was a time when i would've freaked over any RHPS-related picture that was 'never-before-seen,'... and now, thanks to this Wild Machine... it is in my grasp! (click to enlarge)

p is for perrine : valerie in 'cannonball run' - video

yes, that's miss valerie perrine. i first noticed her in 'superman' as the fashionable and not-so-dumb, flawless miss tessmacher. (i hope i spelled that right, i'm not gonna look it up right now.) but instead of posting a superman pic, i thought i'd post this little clip of video. miss perrine had a funny cameo in the 1981 ensemble ...comedy? 'cannonball run,' directed by hal needham. she pulls over a hot black lamborghini and encounters the spandex-clad miss adrienne barbeau and her blonde sidekick. valerie's only on for a few seconds, but she's crucial. the clip is only 40 seconds long, so give it a roll.

p is for party!

yeah, i know this is a weird one. but i get a kick out of it, so here goes. let's see, on the left we have the wild and often-chemically altered mr. keith moon; some anonymous broad to his right, but more importantly, you can see he's got his arm around a teenage-curious, recently-posessed, very, very sexy miss linda blairrrr! wow, what a wild night that must've been. i can only imagine the 'intake' that went down that night, if you know what i mean. and i should mention that i didn't add-juxtapose the image of linda on the cover of the e-classy, classy 'oui' on the right. like, i fished it that way right off the web. i like linda blair a lot. she's 100% cool in my book. i think she's adorable in the late 70's skate-ploitation film 'rollerboogie.' she was so cute, so curvy and tanned and sassy with her big glossy make-up job. dig it. (click to enlarge)

p is for pose

...as in, 'strike a pose!' and what a pose this is, ladies and gentlemen! i have no idea what year this was, or what publication it was for or anything like that. i can tell you that the model is the one and only raspy-voiced miss lauren 'real teeth' hutton. i've always liked lauren. although she was extremely beautiful, she always seemed relavtively real. and she's funny, too. i think most of us might remember her as the feisty and proper miss charlotte taylor wilson in the awful-but-great 1981 swashbuckling comedy 'zorro the gay blade,' directed by peter medak. yeah, a lot of people bag on that movie, and i admit, its no 'das boot' or anything, but its a lot of fun. and like, with george hamilton taking a double role, its leading characters are twins, so you know that hit home with jean-lucien and i when we were young. but yeah, i love this shot. i'm sure the shot was harrowing, with like, high-powered fans and multiple, multiple takes. but the end result is fabulous. and i love what she has on. very sassy and sexy and sporty and cute. (click to enlarge)

p is for playboy

yeah, i've posted several playboy covers so far on 'planetcool,' and most of my mates surely know of my devotion to vintage playboys. the girls were so much curvier, so much more playful, and almost assuredly 99.9% silicon free. i mean, look at those sturdy, curvaceous legs! look at those amazing vintage platform shoes! man, i don't know what's sexier; the broad, or the shoes! i love the fact that she's smiling though, instead of throwing down that steely-eyed, bitchy, i-can-and-will-kick-your-ass! look. yeah, this girl looks like she'd go for a pillow fight, some tickling, and some laughs before she 'got serious.' its amazing to look at this picture and know that most modern amercian girls would actually call her fat. i chose this one because well, first of all, i hadn't posted it yet, and also because its the issue for september, 1972... the year jean-lucien and i were born. i don't know if i ever had this issue. if i did, it must've had the cover torn off, because i really don't think i owned this cover. yeah, i got most of my vintage playboys and penthouses at the very well-stocked, dirty, unprofessional, and now-defunct Atlas bookstore in greensboro, nc. man, we combed the hell out of that place, didn't we lovers? (click to enlarge)

good-night kiss

breaking the alphabet with a hard romantic kiss good-night.
i love you all.
sweet dreams

o is for oksana

...oksana baiul. despite what i've put my mind through in the last several years, i still have very vivid memories of the 1994 winter olympics. i had been watching figure skating all my life, but i'd never seen anything quite as unique and spellbinding as the young ukrainian, miss oksana baiul. when she skated, it was like i was watching a nymph spinning silk. at several times during her olympic trials, she literally stopped my breath. just when i expected her body to go in one direction, she went in the other. just when i thought she was going to pose and move like the other girls, she didn't. and i was even able to see past the pink fluff and the ponytail to recognize the artist in there. i mean, look at this pose... what the hell...! it hardly looks human. and wow, the lovely pale fortune of her face. for those of you who've never seen her work, i've included her gold medal-winning performance below.

o is for oksana : olympic gold - video

yes, the quality is a little bit splotchy, but i still thought it was worth posting. i love the choice of music. jean-lucien and i had this performance on vhs, and we used to turn the sound down, and play it over and over again, in our heavily-decorated scarlet room, scoring it with everything from joni mitchell to primus. no joke.

o is for 'okay sign'

...again, i'm kind of stretching this. i have no idea if the young morrissey pictured here was actually making the 'okay' sign with his two slightly-blurred fingers. its a rare shot...if only for the fact that its a 'smiths'-era shot of morrissey, and he appears to be smiling and having an actual light moment. its weird, when i was knocking around back in the genuine 80's, i really didn't find morrissey attractive. i didn't even think he was good-looking. but knowing about him the way i do now, i find younger shots like this quite charming. i mean, being a pop star was the only thing he ever wanted to do. and he did it. he knew he had the talent and the inner fortitude to do it, and he did it. and also, from what i know of the smiths' last days, and of the trials (literally) he endured in becoming a solo artist, i have to admire his iron will, and his unbending attention to his craft. so now, to me, he's very cute. even the high hair seems to suit him. i love you, morrissey. and thank you.

o is for 'opression joke'

...again, i'm reaching. but hey, with 26 letters to get through, it'll take me forever to get to 'z' if i start taking myself too seriously. anyone who's explored 'planetcool' has probably noticed i'm a lifelong fan of vintage MAD magazine, and particularly the art of Dave Berg, and his 'lighter side of...' observations. here is a single panel jean-lucien sent me a while ago, but that one panel is more than enough to get the joke across. i love the lines, the rooms he draws, and whoa, look at that venemous look on that hippy chick's face... does she hate 'the establishment' or what? rock on, hippy chick! your barefoot ways 'shall inherit,' or whatever.

o is for... oral, i guess

i mean, yeah... when i first came to the keys here, i was gonna give myself the night off from the alphabet concept. but then i asked myself, like, why don't i find something first, like in my very extensive archives, and then see if i can possibly 'caption it' with something that starts with the right letter without having to stretch the concept too far. so, when i saw this old notebook illustration featuring two lads from xtc on one side, and some chick working her 'mouth magic' on some dude from 'caligula,' i thought 'oral' was appropriate enough. i only hope i don't get 'flagged' by some self-appointed moral policewoman out there. (i say 'woman,' because i have a real hard time believing any grown guy would have a problem with this piece. i just don't get women sometimes.) in any case, i hope i don't get flagged. and it was made a long time ago. (as if that makes any difference at all.) the two british lads on the left are andy partridge and terry chambers... or is it barry andrews? i don't feel like checking right now. its andy and one of those two. and on the right, well... its some practically anonymous actress from 'caligula' getting read to 'throat on down' on some practically anonymous ...inches.

o is for 'on tape!'

and its also for 'orange,' as in 'a clockwork orange.' man, i'm tired tonight. this is probably the only thing i'm going to post, but it like it. i like it because just seeing a photo of a tape like this stirs up my sensory memory. like, without having to try hard at all, my hands remember what it felt like to pick up and handle those old plastic clamshells with the clear plastic protecting the cardboard cover, spine, and back. i think its amusing though, that this one clearly says 'beta.' i never owned a beta machine. we got our first vhs early 1984, i think. it was a huge silver block with lots of groovy green lights on it. hey, oddly, for the first time since i was 12, i don't even own a vcr. i never thought that day would come, you know what i mean? man, jean-lucien and i must've taped literally miles of programming. and most of its still in my mom's house back home.

o is for 'original sin' - inxs : video

i am genuinely surprised how fresh and neat and sound this song is. i love it.

o is for the overlook

the overlook hotel, ladies and gentlemen. jean-lucien really should be the one writing this; i've said as much before. i just hooked this shot tonight. i had several screen captures to choose from, but for some reason, this one seemed to indicate the surrounding surreal hotel better than most of them. the sophisticated 'sit down' with a sage, fellow clairvoyant, the almost-royal silver dish of chocolate ice cream, complete with a silver spoon... all of it tastes like an official 'changing of the guard.' and perhaps that is not unintentional. i've read the book, and although purists might disgaree, it seems to me as if halloran (scatman crothers) was interviewing young, angelic danny for the position of 'caretaker' in much the same way that ullmann was interviewing his father, jack. he seems to be asking danny, as best he can, if he can 'handle the workload,' ... an unconventional workload that incorporates the psychological stress of isolation, the burdens of personal responsibility, and the lonely bewilderment that results from the supernatural perception of past grizzly acts.

o is for overlooked

yes, one of the elements that inspired me to

explore

'planetcool,' was the desire to present, promote, and praise talents that don't get their share of the spotlight. one such talent is the actor ronan vibert. i've mentioned him before, but i think he's really good, so here comes the spotlight again. from 'jeeves and wooster' to 'the shadow of the vampire,' to 'lara croft,' i've seen enough of his work to realize he's an unsung gem. he's versatile enough to play a 'champagne villian' in any action movie... he's handsome enough to be a romantic lead, and judging by this shot from the 1999 bbc production of 'the scarlet pimpernel,' he can handle serious 'history' and costume parts, too. he played the wicked and unscrupulous robespierre. i wasn't able to find a shot from the exact chapter i wanted; (i wanted him in a slightly different wig...) but what the hell, he has timeless handsome features, a light, interesting english voice, and the zeal to make faces and take risks when the part calls for it. you can see him in the 'jeeves and wooster' episode 'bertie sets sail,' and also as the cameraman wolfgang muller in the brilliant, dark, and often hilarious 'the shadow of the vampire.'

o is for '...okay, whatever.'

yeah, i admit, the o's are proving pretty difficult for me, so you're going to see a lot of 'reaching' entries. like, just tonight, i found this extremely groovy and unintentionally hilarious shot of davy 'the wave' jones wearing some kind of large and supposedly accurate native american headdress. he's from manchester, england. but i gotta admit, it looks good on him. i mean, i'm not gonna lie... at his peak, davy jones was a pretty good-looking guy. and he's still 'working it,' on stage, i mean, as part of the remaining monkees. but it appears this shot was taken at some late 60's rock festival. i know micky dolenz was at monterey pop, so maybe that's where this shot was taken. i've always loved that style of indian headdress. i know it sounds odd, but there aren't many people it looks goofy on. like, its surprisingly easy to 'pull off,' as a 'look.' where ever davy is in this shot, he looks happy. i suppose the 'treats' were 'prime,' if you know what i mean. one thing that sucks about being a modern monkees fan; now days, ever since 'pirates of the carribbean,' when you google 'davy jones,' you get about 13 pages of that squid-faced guy before you reach even one shot of 'the Wave.'

o is for oldman

...gary oldman. okay, i know i already got him once when i was in the 'g's,' but the o's are proving to be harder than i thought, so give me a break. and hey, one more sweet picture of gary is only going to add high-class sexiness to your day. this shot is from the... cult classic..? 1990 tom stoppard film 'rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead.' have you ever seen the coverbox? it makes it look like richard dreyfuss is like, its main star and main reason to 'check it out.' i can't say this is the first movie i noticed gary oldman in, its hard for me to remember back that far... but i know it was sometime around there. i loved the snappy, quip-laden, cerebral script... and i really loved the costumes... all those sexy layers of heavy leather and all those laces and straps and boots and ties and blousy shirts...! i remember at the time i had a hard time deciding who was hotter; gary oldman or tim roth. but, after roth did 'planet of the apes,' i became all like, '...tim roth? who's tim roth?' i think he absolutely peaked, career-wise, with his foppy swordfight sequence in 'rob roy.' ( "...my factor will call upon your grace's factor...") so yeah, now there's no contest, its gary all the way. i know there was some haziness in the stoppard script as to which one was rosencrantz and which one was guildenstern, but according to the faceless cyber-oracle that is IMDB, gary oldman was, in fact, rosencrantz. mmm, so pretty... you know i want to 'go into detail!' and '...devle!!' into all those complicated layers of clothing to find the warm pale flesh underneath. (did i just say that? and i really gonna post this without deleting it? sigh, i guess so.)

n is for 'nozin' aroun' : the young ones, ben elton - video

happy birthday darling. i love you the most.

n is for norell

yes, norell. its a lesser-known, pricey, and altogether captivating perfume. i had a big bottle of it a long time ago that had previously belonged to my mom. but i used it down to its last half-inch. i love it. in my opinion, it outshines any chanel. i've got so many memories attached to that scent. its complex, intelligent, woodsy, and both cool and warm at the same time. i wish i had some. sigh. but i can't find any place up here that sells it. so, when i saw miss dunaway here hawking my signature perfume, i only had one thing to say... 'hey, bitch! that's my scent...!'

n is for nurse

okay, i admit i'm totally cheating on this one. but you'd be surprised how few n's there are out there. and i've been waiting to post this shot of the lush and lovely miss bernadette peters for a long time. she is definitely invited to the slumber party. and is she a space alien or something? i mean, have you seen her recently? apart from some slightly-deepening 'smile lines,' she still looks effing incredible. i can't remember a time in my life when bernadette wasn't out there, sounding great and looking fabulous. and she's living proof that a chick doesn't have to give in to the social pressures to 'tan it.' she's pale as milk, and she looks fantastic. hey, wake up ladies, maybe that's precisely why she looks so great; she's stayed the eff out of the sun! and i love her singing voice, too. and she's funny! so here's to you, bernadette. cheers.

n is for 'new waves!' the 'scatter perm' ad - video

yes, its the one and only 'scatter perm' commercial. a new wave in home permanents! i really don't think i need to say too much about this one, only that if you're real sharp, you can spot ali mcgraw, erin gray, and i think maybe cheryl tiegs. i love the line about, '...its the perm that doesn't show.' uh, it doesn't show? then why did i spend my 1971 four bucks?

n is for new wave

again, i think this one speaks for itself. i wish people out there would make quality scans of all their old duran-era 'star hits,' 'smash hits,' 'tiger beat,' and like, i think there was one called 'no.1' in the UK. not only is the big headshot of john taylor really cute, but even more interesting if you 'click to enlarge,' are all the other features mentioned. for instance, i think i can read something about an 'a-ha contest,' AND a 'depeche mode contest.' what kind of contests could these have been? i mean, i guess you'd get records, posters, pins, and other junk. i'm quite sure i never entered one. i think, even at 14 years old i was like, '...hey, unless i get to meet-and-hang-out-with the band,' then i'm not going to bother.' oh, and by the way, the caption about: 'notice, no spandau' was added by me. ahhh, i wish i had been rich enough at the time to always buy two copies of 'star hits,' one to cut the pin-ups out of, and one to keep intact for posterity. actually, in retrospect, it was a high quality fan magazine, i mean, they really put a lot of work into each issue. (sorry the color is a little garish, i did the best i could.)

n is for nick rhodes, seriously

so, after you read the entry below, you'll realize why i had to dig-up-and-post a cool, flattering, pretty shot of the genius that IS mr. nick rhodes. this shot was taken in 1987, in the very cool 'notorious' era. hey, how cool was that song 'meet el presidente?' hey, i might have to post that one if i can find a good version. i think he looks great here. i mean, the fringed sleeves are quite 'dated,' but i can't bag on it too hard; i owned-and-wore a red suede fringed jacket around that time. but even with the over-posing and the jacket and the white-bleached bangs, he still comes off looking very cool. and facially in this shot, i can see why i was in love with him then, and now. and he's got a great sense of humor. have you ever looked up a video called 'nick's stolen moments' on youtube? its basically a home video nick took of himself over like, a week of being nick rhodes. he comes off very playful and bright. i hope its still 'up,' you know, if you wanna take a look at it. ahhh, my sweet nick rhodes... sigh.

n is for nick rhodes, with apologies

okay, i realize i'm going to have to find a dazzling shot of mr. nick rhodes to make up for the fact that i posted this one. if i had to guess, i'd say it was taken sometime around 1986. i totally mean no disrespect. not only do i firmly believe nick rhodes is a beautiful human being, physically, i also think he is a blazingly talented individual, a visionary musician and artist, and he takes his craft of quality inventive pop very seriously. and make no mistake, i take him very seriously. in many ways, he IS duran duran. but i just couldn't resist posting this. i think it speaks for itself. yikes.

joke break

okay, so this doesn't fit into the alphabet, but hey... a little joke break never hurt anybody. i can only imagine what kind of sniffity-goings-on happened when these two gents got together. bowie looks like, '...hey, where'd that camera come from?' and johnny's all like, asking him if he's got '...the stuff.' i'm sure this was backstage at some function. imagine the scintillating conversation. for what its worth, dig it.

m is for miss michaels

that's dorothy michaels, of course. i really should post more than one thing tonight, but i've been yawning and sleepy like, since 2pm. so i decided to mark my place by leaving it in the very capable hands of the new hospital administrator, miss emily kimberly. EMILY: "...do you know what? i'm think i'm going to give every nurse on this floor...and electric cattle prod, and instruct them to just zap him...in his badoobies..." RON: (outraged) "...cattle prod...?!" EMILY: (into the phone) "...ruby...? hi... you wanna open up the yellow pages in... under the uh, section of 'farm equipment retail...?'" man, its the best. if this ends up being the only post tonight, just remember lovers, i love you all. dearly. meet me back here tommorrow, for more wild trivial celebration. (click to enlarge to read the tiny caption)

m is for morrissey... smiths-era : shoplifters of the world unite : video

may the five-fingered discount live on.

m is for morrissey - smiths era

i took this shot from my smiths video compilation dvd. i think he's doing the magnificent and haunting song from their 'louder than bombs' cd, 'shoplifters of the world unite.' its such fun to play with that smiths dvd, because like, 90% of the time, the camera's on his face. (mmm, no effing kidding, he's the lead singer.) well, on the disc its clear that he's on some kind of 'solid gold' type show, because the entire band is obviously lip-synching. but he looks great. i like the fact that he dares to wear a smiths t-shirt when he's actively IN the smiths. lets face it, he WAS the smiths. (yeah, johnny marr, whatever.) anyway, i thought this shot came out quite nicely.

m is for mia

i love mia farrow. i don't know much about what she's doing with 'the children of the world' these days. i admit, i'm far more enthusiastic about her film career. i loved her in all her woody allen stuff, but the film i have rolling most often is the roman polanski masterpiece 'rosemary's baby.' i learned recently that this picture was in fact the very first cover of People magazine. as you can probably tell from her costume, it is celebrating her role as the vapid Daisy in the disappointing film version of f. scott fitzgerald's overrated story 'the great gatsby.' well, perhaps 'overrated' is too strong a word. 'outdated,' maybe? all i know is that i remember feeling less that moved after reading the book. and i remember being even less impressed by the movie version. (we watched it in class.) personally, apart from 'rosemary's baby,' i think she was best in woody allen's 'husbands and wives' and 'hannah and her sisters.' and i even liked her in 'alice.' and she was good in 'radio days,' too. (that's a highly underrated woody allen film, if you want my opinion.)

m is for mike

mike nesmith. i know some people love to bag on the monkees, and i can appreciate where they're coming from, but i will defend michael nesmith. along with peter tork, michael was an actual, true, struggling musician when he auditioned for the television show back in 1966. he was newly married, hungry, with a baby on the way, and his laundry apparently in his car when he came in to try out. all of the songs that mike wrote for the monkees were exceptional. ('sweet young thing,' 'papa jean's blues,' and 'mary mary' were among some of his best-known early monkee efforts. ) in their later records, after they'd won the right to play their own stuff, he bloomed into an eclectic, creative, and daring songwriter. post-monkees, he burst into a prolific songstress. his 'first national band' and solo recordings are rare and wonderful examples of slightly-country-flavored pop genius. i suggest anyone who's curious to dig up a compilation of the 'first national band' recordings. its some of the catchiest, coolest, and most cohesive stuff i've ever heard. songs like 'the grand ennui' and 'nevada fighter' and 'silver moon' are absolute jewels. if you can stand a little twang, i implore you to seek it out.

m is for marisa

marisa berenson, ladies and gentlemen. i can't remember the first time i saw the lovely marisa. i'm thinking it might have been in blake edwards underrated black comedy 's.o.b.' but i know her best from her role as natalia in bob fosse's 'cabaret.' this shot, however, is from stanley kubrick's gorgeous 1975 epic 'barry lyndon,' where she played opposite ryan o'neal as the lilting, melancholy, ethereal lady lyndon. she looked perfectly appropriate in the grandeur of her costume. i read the william makepeace thackeray book when i was in residential rehab. i'm not trying to be melodramatic, that's the truth. the movie is surprisingly faithful to the original work. some of the dialogue was, i think, directly lifted. marisa was perfectly cast; in the book lady lyndon was little more than a wealthy, glamorous phantom. i don't remember where i found this shot. i mean, i didn't capture it from the disc, but i tricked it after i found it to bring out the contrast. i wish she had been in more stuff, i think she's wonderful.

m is for malkovich

do i even need to say 'john' malkovich? i mean, there aren't a lot of other malkoviches out there in the public eye. i'll make this one short, because the shot is small. i had my 'dangerous liaisons' disc in, and was trying to get some usable stuff. but i have to admit, the flim stock on the dvd was less than luscious. they should like, 'criterion' remaster it or something. but i like this one, because it looks like he's blowing a kiss or something, but actually i think i caught him on the end of the word 'no.' he looks so young and silky and gorgeous in that outfit. seriously, everything valmont walks around in is divine. he never looked better. i mean, he's pratically in drag. i think it was this movie that really kick-started my hots for him in the first place. mmm, 'come back for it.'

m is for mrs. robinson

i had a hard time deciding which screen capture of mrs. robinson i should post. i mean, i've taken dozens. she's the best. it sounds weird, and perhaps a little twisted and immoral, but in a lot of ways, mrs. robinson has served as a role model for me. i think its her coolness, her poise, and unshakeable self-assuredness that i find so attractive. and she's very sexy. hey, she's a broad who knows what she wants, and knows how to get it. and this is a tiny detail, but i think its worth mentioning... in the scene where she has benjamin over, that first night after he drives her home. well, they're inside, in her little parlor, and all her booze decanters and i think even her cigarette lighter, are molded into some kind of 'tiki' themed vessel. like, if i remember correctly, she picks up a tiki the size of a damn barbie doll to light her cig or pour the drinks. this shot was extremely tricky to snag. it shows her walking across elaine's room towards ben, and since she's in motion, it was hard to freeze, but i think i got it in a single shot. then i tricked it, and that's that. i'm still pretty proud of it. i love the colors. (click to enlarge)

m is for mick jagger

here's a great shot i found one night when i was fishing around for picksh. now, i realize the image of mick himself in this picture is somewhat unremarkable, but that t-shirt really gets me. i don't know why i think its so hilarious, but i do. i almost wonder if mick is even sober enough to know the shirt is in the shot with him. hell, i'm sure he does, which makes the shot even funnier. its like, i can imagine him saying like, 'hey mate, turn around so they can read your shirt, and i'll pose next to it, which will be a real scream, because I AM mick jagger...!' it would only be funnier if mick himself was photographed wearing the shirt.

m is for margret ...ann-margret

hey, you know... i'm not gay or anything but... wow. dangerous curves, man! i don't remember where i found this shot, but wow. they just don't make 'garter' outfits like that anymore. and they don't make bodies like that anymore either. i mean, imagine damn stringy gweneth standing next to miss ann. yeah, nice try gweneth, better luck next time. like, if i looked like that in a corslet and garter belt, i'd never wear anything else. like, i'd wear it down to the stop n' shop. the hair looks great on her, too. and man, i've seen her recently, and she still looks great. what a firecracker. didn't she have like, some kind of 'fall' or accident during one of her vegas shows and like, broke her collarbone or something? i don't have 'the facts' on that. man, whatever happened to the hourglass figure? i say we 'bring it back,' you know? okay, this is a pretty lame post, but ann sure looks great, am i right folks? oh, and i have to tell lucynell specifically, she should input ann's name into the above left search field, and check out something i posted a long time ago. its a 3 minute advertisement she made for 'canada dry' beverages. its the 'now' costume-change-dance-number most! (click to enlarge, i think.)

m is for michael stipe - freak variety

yeah, there are several 'flavors' of the southern genius michael stipe. we had the early, curly-haired, cherubic variety, then he started shaving it when he started to go bald... then he practically had a mohawk, and for some reason started spray-painting on wraparound-shades, and i think i saw a shot of him onstage in pants made out of duct tape, and i guess the list of 'freak looks' for mr. stipe could go on and on. but i like this one. i know its from a 'more freaky' era, rather than a 'less freaky' one, but i still love the contrast and the ruffles and the way the shot itself is composed. (and i confess, the whole thing became a lot more striking after i went in and airbrushed peter buck and mike mills out from behind him.) but when all is said and done, i totally love and even revere michael stipe. he's cool in my book, even when he's not being so cool.

m is for morrissey - jobriath t-shirt

tonight i start digging into the M's... and i think i can guarantee a few pictures of the talented and sexy and mysterious morrissey. this is a recent shot, and by that i mean it was taken in the last ten years. i've always liked this one. i think i've already made it clear i think he's sexier older. this is just a nice, clear, close, large, handsome casual shot. he's spent a lot of time in suits and ties over the last decade, so its nice to see him a little more 'loose.' like you can almost imagine bumping into him at the mall or something. malls, man. i can remember almost getting in trouble running top-speed through some big mall in winston-salem with my very grown-up, adult, not teenage friends christine, jeff, and rowdy. a security guard stopped us and told our 'should-know-better' asses to cool it or else we'd have to leave 'the premises.' (oh, and i have it on pretty good authority that 'jobriath' was less than thrilling.) man, what was the name of that main mall in winston-salem?

l is for 'lie down and be counted' : video - neil innes

i tried not to post another neil innes video, but i couldn't resist. when i first checked this one out, like, ten months ago, i wasn't sure i 'dug it,' you know? but later, i was out by the water smoking a camel, and i realized i couldn't get it out of my head. eventually, i even began to think he looked 'okay' in the raincoat and fake moustache. so i hope you dig it, lovers... i love you back.

l is for...lestat wants to borrow that top : video - artist unknown

i found this one a long time ago. it kills me every time i watch it. i remember seeing 'shadow of the vampire' at the litchfield cinemas. you know, lucynell, please correct me if i'm wrong, but i seem to remember seeing you in the ticket line that night. i mean, i don't think you rode up there with us, i think jean-lucien and i went there like, just the two of us. but for some reason part of my mind wants to place you there. in any case, please dig this vid. it slays me. oh, and before you start it, its like, super-loud, so get ready with the volume control.

l is for 'lawrence of arabia'

man, one summer i had such an intense affair with
'lawrence of arabia.' i rolled it constantly. i used to have my old bedroom's audio-visual equipment set up so i could play a movie with the picture off... and i used to play 'lawrence of arabia' and fall asleep to the soundtrack, dialogue and all. i loved maurice jarre's music, and i adored the words of robert bolt's script. to me, for a while, it was one big, sprawling audiophile lullabye. i still identify with the film's 'el aurence' character. his poise, his aching and chronic identity crisis, his strange-yet-keen logical view of battle, his guilty bloodlust, his vanity.. his want for appreciation and acclaim... all of it struck me. sigh... peter o'toole's 'el lawrence,'... he IS my joan of arc. (click to enlarge)

l is for 'the lotus eaters'

here's a cool slice of notebook art i constructed and scanned a long time ago. don't get me wrong, there are elements of jean-lucien's work in it, too. i mean, we're almost completely symbiotic, so it might go without saying that both our hands are (were) in it. it was laid down as a notebook illustration, back when i still had to carry a notebook around. lets see, from left to right, we've got ian holm as science officer ash from 'alien,' and on the right, surprise-surprise, its georgina hale from 'mahler.' i typed the 'lotus' text mostly after the michael stipe lyric, which was mostly based on the chapter in 'the odyssey' about the lotus eaters. i did my fair share of hand-inking the little black squares, but as i said, jean-lucien deserves (at least) equal credit. (click to enlarge)

l is for lickit

i have to give jean-lucien full credit on this one. a long time ago he managed to get this incredible shot from the 'who put the M in Manchester?' dvd. i couldn't tell you what song it was during, but i do know it was a 'blink-and-miss-it' kind of shot, so hats off to jean-lucien's sharpshooting skills. he artfully cropped it, did the tricking, and added the text. i love this one. its so 'emerald-creamy,' i could look at it all day. man, morrissey's really 'grown into' his male sexiness. hey lucy, i wish i had the means to send you the 'm in manchester' dvd. i know when i got mine, i wasn't the biggest morrissey fan in the world, but after seeing it once, i played it so much i'm surprised the dvd didn't like, evaporate in the machine. i mean, not only does he (and his band) look incredible in it, the songs and sound quality are first-class-amazing. even the few smiths songs he does come off magnificently. i really recommend it. (click to enlarge.)

l is for learning lines

"...well, i really think of you all as m-my daughters, and what kind of mother would i be if i didn't give my girls tits...tips...its tips...tips..." man, need i really say more? this shot is, of course, a screen capture from sydney pollack's 1982 comdey masterpiece 'tootsie.' whoah, i looove 'tootsie.' just like 'jaws,' its one of those movies i know so well i can pick up on almost any dialogue cue and 'real-fast' shoot back with the next line. i mean, its got it all! cross-dressing, humor, sex, betrayal, and even a romantic musical montage, set to stephen bishop's dreamy signature song, 'it might be you.' and i suppose i should give geena davis a mention. she's the one in the teeny bra and panties doing some kind of vague exercise in the dressing room mirror. i don't know if you can really see it in the screen capture, but i love the pastel unicorn pin-ups geena's got up on the wall. i mean, pastel unicorns... how '82 can you get...? (click to enlarge)

l is for laurie

ohhhh, my darling love, hugh laurie. sigh. i know i mention it often, but i pride myself on having had a crush on hugh like, a full decade or more before he struck all the common screens in 'house.' this shot is a screen capture i shot from the first-ever episode of the bbc's 'jeeves and wooster.' i turned it black and white and tricked the contrast. man, i don't know what it IS about hugh that makes me remember the 'good parts' about being in love. i mean, he's not even that cute by 'conventional' standards. but on the other hand, he's not quite ugly enough to qualify for the 'ugly is the new cute' classification. maybe its those ocean blue eyes. maybe its because he makes me laugh. his bit as the scarfaced jailer in the second season of 'blackadder' is hilarious. most of his sketch comedy series with stephen fry ('a bit of fry and laurie') was very funny and clever. i love the fact that he seems thin, but if you really look at his body in the 'jeeves and wooster' series, he's actually quite substantial. i mean, his chest and legs and back and thighs and shoulders look big and heavy, like heavy enough to 'pin you down.' ahhhh, man. i know he's like, all married and everything. i guess that's why the Good Lord gave me a very active and very, very vivid imagination. hey, hugh... i'll be 'thinking about you' later, whether you like it or not. mmmm.

l is for lupone

miss patti lupone. she was the first 'evita,' (in new york) and in my opinion, the only 'evita.' just like michael crawford will always be 'the only' phantom of the opera for me. i've never seen the play, but i had the original cast album back in the late 80's, and jean-lucien and i played the hell out of it. i think somewhere deep in a cabinet in my mom's house, there's even some home video (shot by jean-lucien) of me back in my old bedroom, vamping and lip-syncing 'rainbow high,' with a ton of makeup on, and my hair pulled back, psuedo 'evita'-style,' with a big-ass red scarf on the ponytail. patti also lent her talents to several movies. she played harrison ford's sister in 'witness,' and dan ackroyd's wife in 'driving miss daisy.' she was magnificent in the late 80's staging of 'anything goes.' she also recently took on the role of 'miss lovett' in the revival of 'sweeney todd.' but to me, she'll always be that sassy songstress from argentina. did you know she was only like, 5 feet tall? maybe less?

l is for lang

miss k. d. lang. i've 'been a fan' for a long time. i wasn't crazy about a lot of her country stuff, but towards the mid '90s, she really bloomed. 'ingenue' is one of the finest albums of that time period. (although if i never hear 'constant craving' again, that'll be okay with me.) she's got one of those voices that like, freaks you out with how good it is, you know? i mean, there are certain performances of hers that i get chills every time i hear. she hits notes i never knew existed. and, like joni mitchell (another canadian) k. d.'s voice is one that's thoroughly unmistakeable. like, if i was dating a guy, and we were in his car, and a k. d. lang song came on, and he tried to insist it was someone besides k. d. lang, i'd think he was such an idiot i'd probably lose some, if not all, of my hots for him. her mid-90's performance of 'johnny get angry' on SNL is amazing. her live version of 'crying' from some televised roy orbison tribute is a killer. i also loved the tongue-in-cheek way she titled one album, 'all you can eat.' ahuh, we get it, k. d., i think we all know what you're talking about. i probably should post a song of hers, but what the hell, i'm not going to.

l is for le bon

ahhh, simon le bon, simon le bon... will you ever really know how much you turn us all on? your hot pop star looks really do the trick... coming in a close second? both john taylor and nick! we love your full lips and your frosted-tipped hair... will i ever bed you down? i can always 'save a prayer.' with those wristbands and funk-belt, you exuded '80's sex... i still 'turn it up,' when i hear that 'fle-fle-fle-flex!' you're sexy enough to jump out of a cake... is it too sleazy to say i want a 'union with your snake?' simon, you're 'notorious,' for doing it right... to have a chance at your 'goods,' i'd run 'faster than light.' simon, 'please, please tell me now,' if you feel the same way, and i'll stop this sucky poem, and go 'my own way.' seriously, folks... dig the very hot simon le bon. get in line ladies! yum!

neil innes : drama on a saturday night - video

ahhh, what can i say? i love this one, he sounds so lovely. i swoon at the simple yet elegant economy of his words. so expertly pretty.
(and if you are moved to see the few other innes videos i've posted, just input his name in the 'search field' to the above left.)

k is for keaton... 'play it again sam' - video

...diane keaton. here is my favorite scene from the 1972 film written by woody allen and directed by herbert ross. dig it.

k is for kira

wow, i can remember when this movie came out. to me, it was like Barbie was real, and she had her own flick. all the costume changes, all the different looks... it was a dream come true to a ten-year old girl. hey, don't get me wrong, i've seen 'xanadu' recently, and from a filmmaking standpoint, it kind of sucks. i mean, who ever came up with michael beck in a 'leading man' role? like he's the 'woodenest.' and the writing is like, thud-city USA. and i know a lot of people 'bag on' gene kelly for being in it, but i've been a gene kelly fan for a long time, and i'm here to testify that a lot of his old studio pictures were no better or worse than 'xanadu.' i take 'xanadu' for what it is... candy. pure candy for the eyes and ears. never underestimate the power of candy.

k is for the kit kat club

if there's one movie that makes me think fondly of my 'real father,' its 'cabaret.' directed by the great bob fosse and released in february 1972, this movie is only slightly older than jean-lucien and me. it was nominated for the best picture oscar that year, but the statuette went to 'the godfather' instead. the leading lady however did walk away with the 'ultimate prize.' liza won for best actress, as did joel grey for best supporting actor as the emcee. i still love this movie, and i still love liza and her devil-may-care portrayal of nightclub singer sally bowles. when i was a kid, i was mesmirised by the flawless and haunting musical numbers, but as woman, i find myself intrigued with the actual storyline. it was based on a german play called 'i am a camera' by john van druten... adapted by christopher isherwood. (i hope all that information is correct.) i think michael york's performance was generally overlooked. he's marvelous as brian, the british 'fish out of water.' he plays an englishman giving language lessons to pay the rent. he and sally meet, and he falls heedlessly into her world of flash, luxury, lust, and superficial pleasures. little do they know, reality, responsibility, and even hitler himself are right around the corner.

k is for 'klute'

directed by alan j. pakula in 1971, 'klute' tells the story of an intelligent and streetwise call girl, bree daniels (played cooly by jane fonda) and a cop who comes into her life as a detective, and, as corny as it sounds, evenutally becomes 'much more.' the cop is played in a very genuine, rooted, and understated way by the great donald sutherland. both jane and donald look great in this 70's thriller that crawls around through an underworld of prostitutes, pimps, and homicide. this film is gritty where it needs to be, scary at all the right times, and doesn't flinch. the scene where klute and bree have to go question a couple of strung-out junkies who are waiting for 'the man' is heartbreaking, desperate, and all too real. even those who have never struggled with the torture of addiction would surely squirm during that particular part. its been a long time since i've seen 'klute,' so i should probably seek it out sometime soon. in my opinion, its 'right up there' with 'the french connection.' and jane looks slinky-great in her sequins and boots. mmm, hookin!

k is for keith

...keith moon, ladies and gentlemen. ahhh, keith and i have a very turbulent past. i fell in dysfunctional love with keith about eight years ago when i wasn't sure i was crazy about living much longer. something about his total disregard for tranquility and order attracted me. plus, he was cute. and even more importantly than that, he could play. it goes without saying that his drumming style is...well, to some extent, indescribable. i even at one time had wild notions of learning the drums. and there was no mystery as to why 'the drums' attracted me; i was wired with so much impacted anger and i had never been afforded a healthy outlet for it. so, beating the hell out of things seemed like a logical means of relief. at the time. still, i have great affection for keith. i like a man who always looks like he's having a good time. i haven't seen too many pictures of keith where it looked like he was 'hating life.' he was a very lucky, sick little boy. innocent and exuberant, explosive and rotten, gleeful and ultimately sad. i hope i'm not being too melodramatic when i say that 'i can relate.' the picture is also from my 'tommy' dvd. i put the disc in earlier and took some shots. it wasn't easy to 'catch him' winking, believe me.

k is for ken russell

yes, i realize i've already given ken adequate praise on the planet, and often. but i couldn't let the k's go by without at least letting him have a slot. so, i wanted to post something obscure from one of his best films. so, a few hours ago, i threw my 'tommy' dvd in, and took some shots. i saw this frame of tommy's mother, (ann-margret) and step-father (oliver reed) primping and preening in the hallway just before going out for a night on the town, leaving tommy in the 'care' of his sadistic cousin kevin. (paul nicholas.) i liked the shot because it keenly depicted the arrogance and self-interest that frank and nora have settled into at this particular point in the story. they haven't given up on tommy's plight altogether, but they have no problem letting him 'just be' as they watch the telly, eat tv dinners, drink booze, and step out to escape their bleak and hopeless 'family life.' i also like this shot because it handily illustrates ken's eye for the theatrical. he has a great talent for getting his actors to go jussst a bit too far, just a bit over the top, in order to relate a mood or nuance or feeling. as in the best silent movies, the facial expressions in ken's films are often exaggerated, as are mannerisims, etc. but i like it. this movie is one of his best. (click to enlarge)

k is for kane

yes, john hurt as kane from 'alien.' he doesn't have too much screen time, comparatively, but he is immortalized by being the 'host' for the creature. he smokes a few balaji imperials, looks worn out, foreshadows his demise by complaining that he 'feels dead,' and is the first one to volunteer to leave the ship and explore the origins of the mysterious 'transmission.' he also gets to writhe and scream and freak out as the thing 'hatches' from his chest cavity. i first became aware of john hurt as the voice of hazel, the brave and bold leader of the escaping rabbits in 'watership down.' i saw him in 'the elephant man,' but obviously he was hardly recognizable. i did see his tremendous performance as the closeted-gay cop 'kerwin,' in the 1982 comedy-thriller 'partners,' where he starred alongside the 'straight cop' played by ryan o'neal. now that's the kind of part that gets noticed.